People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
