All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
