So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize