so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
you would pick up someone in the library
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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