My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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