I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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