is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Mom said you looked used
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
