o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
