i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize