love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
