I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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