just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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