so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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