Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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