she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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