before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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