dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
