I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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