Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
