I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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