who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
