but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
