I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
