well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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