i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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