his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
