You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
