where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
