Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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