They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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