we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
