I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
