Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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