Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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