So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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