dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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