when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Randomize
