Is it normal to miss your booty call?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
