A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
