That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
