if you like me you must not know who I am
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
