last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
