break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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