The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
