Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
