just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Randomize
