Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
