let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I wish you could order shots online.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
