Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
