rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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