And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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