Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
