ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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