Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
